


On the Corner of Lost and Found

by WevyrDove



Series: Lost and Found [2]
Category: Supernatural, destiel - Fandom
Genre: AU, Alpha!Dean, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Destiel - Freeform, Drugging, Gang Rape, Knotting, M/M, Marking, Omega!Castiel, Rape/Non-con Elements, Scent Kink, Self-Lubrication, bottom!Castiel, heat cycle, top!dean
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-01
Updated: 2015-03-01
Packaged: 2018-03-15 20:24:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 7
Words: 19,832
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3460835
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WevyrDove/pseuds/WevyrDove
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel is an omega with a painful past who has worked hard to assimilate into society as a beta. Dean is a rich and successful alpha who is happy with his single life, until the day he bumps into Castiel. When Castiel resists Dean, Dean refuses to take no for an answer. As Dean continues to pursue Castiel, the omega's defenses weaken and he finds himself drawn to Dean. When Dean's impatience leads him to use more devious methods on Castiel, the omega's dark past comes to light.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my work for the SPN kink Big Bang. I really enjoyed writing this story. It's my first A/B/O fic, so hopefully I did ok.
> 
> I want to give a big shout-out to my dear friend, Keri, who was my beta for this work. She was generous enough to take time out of her busy schedule to read my fic and provide so much helpful feedback. Her suggestions really helped me shape the story, and I am so grateful for her insight and encouragement. Thank you Keri!!

Castiel winced as the needle bit into his arm. Already eight months into the treatment, he should have been used to receiving the monthly injections. Castiel was participating in a clinical trial for a new slow release version of their hormone suppressants. The biodegradable polymer delivery system had been developed as an alternative to daily pills or weekly injections. So far, Castiel hadn't exhibited any side effects except a bit of fatigue. He also found that around the time of month he usually went into heat, he felt jittery and irritable. The drug did what it was supposed to do though, and he hadn't had a heat since he started the injection regimen.

Previously Castiel had forgotten his pills regularly; he had preferred to swallow his meds, since he hated needles. Missing his pills led to heats, which led to more sick days. He sequestered himself at home during that period; he became hyperaware of everyone’s body odor and if he caught the whiff of an alpha, it made him crazy with desire. He also hated having to wear pads to soak up the constant slick he secreted during his heat. It was inconvenient and embarrassing. Additionally, the constant need to mate was frustrating and exhausting. Castiel had sworn he would never touch another alpha again, but none of the many toys Castiel had tried came close to replacing the feel of an alpha cock with swollen knot. Most of all, Castiel missed the human contact; being held and cradled while joined, until the alpha’s knot finally softened and released them both from their intimate embrace. He had started running out of sick and vacation time, so when he found out about the clinical trial, he had readily applied. He was pleased with the results; most days he could almost convince himself he wasn’t an omega.

Castiel was a scientist, and his research was in the area of cancer genetics. In particular he was interested in the genes that might indicate predispositions to cancer in the reproductive systems of omegas. Castiel had worked hard to get where he was; in addition to taking suppressants, he went to his therapist regularly and found outlets in meditation and exercise. There were other omegas who has successfully integrated into society, but they rarely revealed their identities. It was too dangerous; at best, you would be ostracized, at worst, you would be raped and killed. If you were lucky, you would be claimed early by a kind alpha. But mating was not a guarantee of a happy ending either. Too many omegas became prisoners in their own homes, subject to the whims of their alphas and their own biological makeup, only valued for their child bearing ability. Omegas who didn't find a mate and weren't suppressed were often lured into prostitution.

Nowadays, Castiel successfully presented as a beta, although he would always have the scars to remind himself of his omega biology. He envied his beta coworkers their safe lives that were unhindered by heats and animalistic drives. But even so, Castiel hadn’t always wanted to be a beta; once upon a time he had dreamed of mating with a handsome and kind alpha, with whom he could make a home and family. He knew better now, but he had hit rock bottom hard before he had finally realized suppression was the only way to save himself. Castiel rarely dwelt on the past, but he would never be able to have a baby. It was part of the reason he focused his research on helping others. He had never had much desire to become a father, but although his sterility wasn't impractical, he was angry and ashamed that the choice had been stolen from him. And he had given up on finding a mate; he was used and damaged goods, no one would want him.

Castiel watched as the nurse removed the needle, swiping the minute amount of blood away with a square of gauze. He gently placed a circular Band-Aid over the injection site.

"All set, Castiel." The nurse, Samandriel, smiled and nodded at Castiel.

Castiel returned the smile. He had long suspected that Samandriel was also a suppressed omega. The younger man certainly looked and acted the part; he was slender and smaller than most betas, and he spoke softly and deferentially. Perhaps he was just submissive in nature, but Castiel could usually tell. There were no claim marks on his neck, but those could be easily covered, and not all omegas who chose to assimilate were running from their alpha mates. At any rate, Castiel didn't know him well enough to ask, and it could be taken as an insult if he was wrong.

"Thanks Sam’driel." Castiel said, pulling his sleeve down and shrugging back into his jacket.

"See you in a month." Samandriel replied. He turned to his laptop to enter in Castiel's vitals, which he had scribbled on a post-it.

Castiel picked up his shoulder bag and left the doctor's office. It was a brisk day in March, and Castiel wrapped his scarf around his neck snugly. He dug his hands into his pockets, keeping his head down as he walked against the wind. The doctor’s office was only a couple blocks away from his workplace so Castiel always walked. This morning, Castiel had been in a rush and missed breakfast. He decided to duck into the coffee shop that was on the way back to work. The door jingled when Castiel pushed into the warm cafe; the smell of coffee and fresh baked goods filled his nostrils, and Castiel sucked it in. But as he walked towards the counter, he paused. Something else was in the air. A scent he couldn't identify that was separate and distinct from the usual coffee shop aromas. Castiel sniffed again; it was a pleasant scent, spicy and sweet with something darker underneath.

"I could smell you the second you walked in." A rough male voice drawled.

Castiel froze. He was fully suppressed, or so he thought. Only the faintest trace of his omega musk was ever present, and that was during the peak of his heat cycle, or what would have been the peak if he wasn't on meds. The shot he had just received wouldn't work instantaneously; there was a half-life for the degradation of the polymer beads, but there should also have been enough overlap from the previous dose. But the half-life was only an estimate, and drug release rates could vary from person to person. It hadn't been a problem previously, but now Castiel realized that today’s date coincided roughly with when the start of his heat cycle would have been without suppressants. Castiel turned to look at the man who had spoken.

The man leaned back in his chair, tipping it back slightly by balancing his legs on the rung under the table. He gave Castiel a smirk. Castiel swallowed hard. He was incredibly gorgeous- sandy hair, emerald green eyes, a nose that a Greek god would envy, and a spray of light freckles across his cheeks. A chiseled jaw and full lips completed his perfect face. He wore a fitted t shirt and ripped jeans, and Castiel couldn't help but admire his sculpted arms. His posture was cocky, as if he was spoiling for a fight. And then Castiel realized where the scent he had caught was coming from. This guy was an alpha.

"Smell something you like?" The man said teasingly, but Castiel heard menace in his tone. "Me too.” he added, taking his legs off the table rung and letting the chair set back on the floor.

"I'm Dean." He offered, holding out his hand. Castiel ignored it and didn't answer.

"I'm suppressed..." He whispered, more to himself than Dean. He felt stunned and caught.

"What did you say?" Dean withdrew his hand, frowning slightly. "It's a shame that you're so rude, with such a pretty face." Dean made a show of inhaling deeply. "And such a lovely scent."

Castiel took a step closer so he wouldn't have to speak too loudly.

"I said, I'm suppressed. And you shouldn't assume so much." Castiel said quietly. "I know your type. You think you're entitled to everything." Castiel couldn't prevent the anger from seeping into his voice, even as he cringed inwardly at the way he was speaking to a stranger. He had been triggered; alphas made him nervous and he never trusted them. And this one has come on to him. Even worse, Castiel had felt himself stirring where he had rarely felt interest since he had started his meds.

"Really?" Dean commented, rubbing the scruff on his face with one hand. "Could have fooled me. And as for what I'm entitled to..." He looked Castiel up and down, and Castiel fought the urge to flee. _Say no firmly and confidently and he should leave you alone_ , he reminded himself. Dean had a predatory grin on his face now and Castiel's desire to run ratcheted upwards.

"I'm sorry. I'm not interested. Please leave me alone." Castiel said loudly, so others sitting nearby could hear him. He hoped his voice hadn't quavered. A couple of heads turned in their direction.

"No harm, no foul." Dean said lightly, holding out his hands in a placating gesture.

Dean shrugged but kept his eyes on Castiel. Their eyes caught for a beat. Then Castiel forced himself to walk away. He could feel the heat of Dean's stare following him as he walked away. Once he was safely outside the shop, Castiel walked out of sight and then let himself lean against the brick wall of a building, burying his face in his hands. He took deep breaths; the cold air hit his lungs almost painfully, but helped him clear his head. After another minute, Castiel was able to continue walking back to work.

When Castiel returned to his desk, he removed his coat and scarf. He rubbed his hands and blew on them to warm them up. Sitting down heavily in his chair, he toggled his mouse to wake his computer up. He automatically reached for his coffee and then realized he had neglected to get any after his encounter with the alpha _._ Castiel felt completely off kilter after their meeting. There was no way he could focus for the rest of the day. He had planned to run some assays in the lab after he came back from the doctor's office, but now he settled for answering emails and writing a report on his results from earlier this week. His mind kept wandering despite his best efforts though; the alpha's smell had been irresistible. Castiel was so angry that he had let the bastard get to him. He thought he was long past those days. He had vowed he would never touch another alpha. And the way _he_ had spoken to him so arrogantly, so sure that Castiel would say yes to anything _he_ suggested. It reminded him too much of another alpha he had known long ago. Castiel pushed down the memory and tried to focus on his work.

…

Dean watched with longing as the omega walked out of the coffee shop. Dean thought he had never seen anyone more beautiful. The omega was just a bit smaller and shorter than Dean, with a vulnerable, open face. Intense blue eyes that reminded Dean of  the evening sky just after dusk, lovely pink lips that were just a bit chapped, and a mop of tousled dark brown hair that Dean would love to mess up even more. The omega smelled way too good and too strongly for someone who claimed to be suppressed. Dean found himself wanting as he hadn't for a long time. But the guy wasn't interested, which both frustrated him and increased his desire for the omega. Dean bit his lip. He didn't even know the guy's name. Dean made a split second decision and then shrugged his jacket on and ran out the door. The omega couldn't have gone far. The cold wind slapped at Dean's face, but he barely noticed, as he walked quickly down the sidewalk. He saw a figure huddled against the wall a half a block down. It was the omega. Dean didn't want to spook him so he waited near another store front, pretending to admire the goods in the window. A few minutes later, the man was up and walking down the street at a brisk pace. Dean followed, closing the distance a bit, but still about a hundred feet behind. He pulled up the hood of his jacket, hunching against the bitter wind.

He followed until the man disappeared into a corporate building. Dean slowed his pace and read the sign by the door: BiOmega Therapeutics. Of course he would be working for a place like this. Dean walked by the glass doors, peering in as inconspicuously as he could. There was a front desk with a receptionist and also a security guard near the entrance. Dean briefly entertained the idea of blustering his way past them and into the offices and labs, but it would be easier to just hire a private investigator. He kept walking and then turned at the next corner into the city park. In early March the trees were still bare, but crocuses and daffodils were starting to poke their heads out of the ground. Dean strolled leisurely through the park despite the cold. His thoughts were full of the omega in the coffee shop. If only he had gotten his name. It had been years since Dean had desired a mate. Once upon a time he still believed in finding "the one" but that had soon devolved into a series of disastrous relationships. They always ended with his would-be mate wanting a family. Dean had no desire for this; his father had been a cruel and domineering man, as well as an alcoholic; an alpha that mistreated omegas and thought of them as sub-human. When Dean was 15, his omega mother had left home with his beta brother, Sam. She was tired of John and his archaic belief that alphas were also superior to betas. John had always treated Sam poorly, but at least he never lifted a hand towards his younger son. He constantly beat Dean, telling his alpha son that he was toughening him up so he could hold his own against other alphas as an adult. But when Sam turned 11, John decided that he didn’t need to “baby” the beta anymore and started beating him as well. After a week of this, Mary took Sam and disappeared in the middle of night.

The years alone with his father had been rough on Dean. He had to take care of everything around the house, and make sure they were both fed. His father miraculously remained employed although when John was home he spent most of his time drunk. Dean had left home as soon as he turned eighteen. To support himself, he worked odd jobs, sometimes as a handyman, sometimes as a bartender or waiter. He found he especially enjoyed the restaurant atmosphere, and eventually took a couple of classes at the local culinary school. Dean was comfortable in the kitchen from the years of cooking for himself and John, although he had never made anything fancy. At school, he found he had a talent for creating new dishes and an instinct for pairing complementary flavors. After he finished his classes, he started as a prep cook at an upscale restaurant near his apartment. Like many alphas, Dean rose quickly through the ranks with the help of his looks and commanding presence. He became involved in the management side of the restaurant, and discovered he had a knack for it. Eventually he decided to open his own business, and today he was the owner of a thriving eatery, _La Storia_. Nowadays, the place practically just ran itself, and Dean just checked in occasionally. 

With the success of the restaurant, he had moved from the small studio he started in into the penthouse apartment in one of the tallest buildings in the city. Other than his expensive home, Dean lived frugally and continued to dress in the same jeans and flannel shirts he had always favored. Despite his wealth and social opportunities, he tended to stay in and cook at home. The exception was when he was trying to woo a potential mate. In those cases, Dean pulled out all the stops, and was happy to lavish gifts and expensive outings on the lucky girl or guy. But relationships didn’t always work out, and Dean had needs too. He had tried hard to live differently from John, but he wasn't above using services that provided omegas for alphas that just needed release. He convinced himself that he was providing much needed employment for these omegas, and he always was respectful with them; afterwards, he left embarrassingly large tips, which made him a favorite of the beta pimps.

He was older now and at thirty-seven, much more in control of his drives. At his age, most alphas had families: a pup or two and an omega at home caring for them. Dean was content to live alone, not wanting to settle but no longer believing in "the one" either. It had been awhile since he had felt like pursuing anyone for more than a casual fuck. But that man, his eyes, his slender frame, and even his anger, they spurred Dean on like no other had done in recent times. Dean had felt his mouth water at the man's scent, his cock stirring even before the omega had turned around and shown his gorgeous face. Dean had to have him. He knew if he persisted, the man would give in to him. Dean had never been refused before. And he liked a challenge. 


	2. Chapter 2

Dean was wearing his best suit. Really it was his only suit, despite the fact that he could easily afford a closetful of them, but it fit him well and he knew he looked good. He had shaved this morning, and carefully styled his hair. He whistled tunelessly as he examined his reflection in the mirror again and adjusted his tie. His private investigator, Balthazar Roche, had come through quickly with Castiel’s personal info when Dean provided physical details and the name of the man’s workplace. From Balthazar, Dean learned that Castiel Novak was a senior scientist at BiOmega Therapeutics, and he lived in an apartment across town. At thirty-nine years old, he was a couple years older than Dean, and he had never been married or had any children. Dean mused about that detail; he knew that many omegas of this age were childless and unattached by choice, but usually they had some sort of history. Dean was certain that Castiel had some sort of past.

“Castiel.” Dean said to himself. The name felt strange to him, he wondered about its origins. There had been that trend of naming babies after angels a few decades ago, and Dean knew his share of Gabriels and Raphaels and even, strangely enough, a couple of Lucifers. But he had never met a Castiel.

Dean’s phone buzzed and he checked his hair one more time in the mirror. He glanced at the screen and saw that his car had arrived. He got into his private elevator, bouncing on the soles of his feet. He couldn’t remember the last time he had felt so nervous. It was ridiculous what Castiel was doing to him, and Dean wasn’t even in his presence. Dean couldn’t wait to smell him again. He knew that the guy had smelled him too, and that he probably liked it despite what he had said.  The elevator pinged and Dean got out on the ground floor, waving to the doorman. He walked up to the black Lincoln that was idling on the curb and got in the backseat. Benny, his usual driver, was at the wheel. He tipped his hat at Dean and greeted him, complimenting him on his suit. Dean managed a smile and then gave him the address. He sat back on the leather, trying to relax himself. Benny glanced at him and then turned around without another word. He could tell that Dean was in one of his moods where he needed quiet.

“We’re here, Mr. Winchester.” Benny announced, pulling up to the curb beside a modest brick building. Dean started, jolted out of his reverie, which mostly involved indecent thoughts about Castiel.

“Thanks Benny.” Dean said, and handed over a wad of bills to Benny. Benny pocketed them without counting; Dean was always generous.

“Thank you, Mr. Winchester.” Benny started to unbuckle so he could get out to open Dean’s door but Dean was already opening the door himself. “Have a good day!” Benny called as Dean slammed the door. He shook his head, and then fastened his seat belt. He saw that Dean was walking into the florist that was on the first floor, and then checked his phone. He had another pickup on the other side of town in ten minutes. He swore and pulled away from the curb, hoping he wouldn’t be too late.

Dean saw Benny driving away through the window of the flower shop. He hadn’t meant to be so abrupt when he left the car, but he wasn’t quite himself right now. He had spotted the florist as soon as they had stopped and he knew he was going to get flowers. He stood in front of a display of readymade bouquets, pondering which ones would be appropriate. The florist had been working on something in the back room, but now she came out and wiped her hands on her green apron.

“Hello? Oh!” She greeted, and when Dean turned around, she stopped in her tracks and smoothed her hair. Dean grinned. He knew what effect he had on people, not just omegas but betas too. The woman seemed flustered. She was cute, with red wavy hair, up in a ponytail, a few wisps falling out on the sides of her face. Hazel eyes and a pale complexion which was pinkish right now because she was blushing. Her name tag said “Anna.”

“Hello Anna.” Dean said smoothly. The sign outside the shop had said Anna’s Flowers, so she must be the owner. “Could you help me find some flowers?”

“Of course.” Anna replied brightly, her hands still restless and now tugging at her apron to make sure it was straight. “What are you looking for?”

Dean wanted to say, _something that says I want to knot you and mark you and make you mine_ , but instead he said, “Something that says I really, really like you and want to get to know you better?”

Anna blushed as if Dean had been talking about her. She stuffed her hands in her pockets. “Well, you can’t go wrong with roses. But those can seem a little serious and heavy handed if it’s someone you’re just getting to know. Tulips are nice, and I have a bunch right now. I think a mix would work. What do you think?”

“Sounds good. I trust you, could you make something for me? That wouldn’t take too long?” Dean smiled brilliantly. Anna blushed again.

“Yes, of course. It’ll just be a few minutes.” Anna hustled back to the back room. Dean browsed his phone while he waited. He hoped that Castiel was home. If not, he could always wait a little while. Balthazar hadn’t been able to get Castiel’s cell phone number. He said that Castiel might not even have a cell phone, which Dean found hard to believe. Who didn’t carry a phone nowadays?

A few minutes later, Anna emerged carrying a lovely bouquet with multicolored roses and tulips, with a sprinkling of other flowers.

“I added some gladioli and tuberoses. I happened to get some from the greenhouse today, they certainly aren’t in season.” Anna explained. “Gladioli say ‘You pierce my heart’ and tuberoses symbolize ‘dangerous pleasures’” Anna blushed again when she described the meaning of tuberoses. Dean smiled appreciatively.

“You read people well, Anna. That’s perfect.” Dean complimented. He certainly was hoping for many pleasures with Castiel.

Anna beamed with pride. She wrapped the bouquet carefully and then presented it to Dean. Dean handed over payment in cash, with extra included.

“Keep the change, for your excellent service.” Dean winked. “Thank you.”

“Oh! Thank you! I do hope you will come back…good luck, with whomever…not that you need it..” Anna babbled. Dean nodded and walked out of the shop, taking a whiff of the flowers.

He stepped in the glassed-in entryway of the apartment building. The inside door was locked but there was a series of buzzers. Dean found the button labeled “Novak” and pressed it. After a moment a voice crackled through the speaker.

“Yes?” Castiel’s voice said uncertainly.

“It’s Dean.” Dean said simply and confidently.

“Who?” Castiel asked.

“Dean. We _didn_ _’_ _t_ have coffee the other day.” Dean rocked on his heels, gripping the bouquet tighter.

“Oh!” There was a pause. “What are you doing here? How did you find me?” There was a hint of panic in Castiel’s voice now.

Dean ignored the question. “Can I come up?”

“Um.” Another pause. “Um. I don’t think you should. Um. I don’t even know you.”

“I’d like to get to know you better.” Dean said patiently. “Come down to see me at least?”

Silence. Dean waited a beat, wondering if he’d have to come back, or wait for someone to open the door on their way in or out. Then the door buzzed open. Dean grabbed the handle eagerly and slipped inside. He walked up the stairs, stopping at the fourth floor, which was also the top floor. He knocked on 4B. He heard some shuffling and then a bolt and a chain being slid back. The door opened, and Castiel gaped at Dean. He was wearing sweatpants and a faded t-shirt and his hair was even messier than usual.

“Can I help you?” Castiel said warily. Dean didn’t miss the quick glance of appraisal that Castiel gave him.

“Oh yes, Castiel…” Dean said suggestively. He held the bouquet out to Castiel, who didn’t accept it.

“How did you find me?” Castiel asked again. He glared at Dean.

“Private investigator.” Dean admitted. He lowered the bouquet. “Please, I just want a chance to get to know you better. Maybe actually get a cup of coffee?” Dean was trying his best to be polite, but now that Castiel was in front of him, and Dean could scent him, he was having trouble keeping his composure. Castiel’s musk was even stronger today; Dean guessed it was because Castiel hadn’t showered. It was driving him crazy; his mouth was practically watering.

“No, I don’t think so.” Castiel said firmly, but Dean could tell he was anxious even though his voice was steady. “Please leave me alone. I’m sorry I can’t help you.” Castiel started closing the door. Dean stopped it with his free hand, and Castiel gasped in fear and surprise.

“Just wait a minute.” Dean growled. “I just want to talk.” Dean knew he was stronger than Castiel, and could easily force his way in, but that wasn’t the way he wanted to do things. He took a deep breath, which unfortunately meant he inhaled more of Castiel’s scent. He was gripping the base of the bouquet hard enough to bruise the stems. Castiel looked at him with wide blue eyes, waiting to see what Dean would do next. Dean moved his hand away from the door.

“Will you at least accept my flowers?” Dean tried again, his voice gentler. He held out the flowers, and Castiel accepted them cautiously.

“Thank you. They’re lovely.” Castiel said politely. “I’m sorry if I gave you the wrong idea though. I told you, I’m suppressed. I’m not interested.”

The corners of Dean’s lips twitched with a smile. “I know. I heard you the first couple of times.” He flicked his eyes up and down Castiel’s frame, and darted his tongue out, meeting Castiel’s eyes again. “But, if you’re suppressed, why do you smell so good to me?” Dean deliberately sniffed.

“I’m not interested.” Castiel repeated, but Dean had seen the flicker of uncertainty that passed across his face.

“Ok, ok. I’m a gentleman, despite what you may think of my type.” Dean backed off, not trusting himself to continue acting like a gentleman if he stayed any longer. He pulled a business card out of his pocket, and held it out. Castiel made no move to take it, so Dean stuck it between the roses in the bouquet. “I’ll just leave this with you, in case you change your mind. Goodbye, Castiel.”

Dean winked at Castiel, and then turned to leave. The door slammed behind him.

…

Castiel leaned his back against the door, and sank down to the floor, tossing the bouquet aside. Jesus, that had been close. Something was wrong with his suppression meds; he would have to go to the doctor on Monday. He should not have been so interested in that man. Especially since Dean had stalked Castiel and come to his home uninvited. _You_ _’_ _re the one that let him in,_ Castiel told himself. He wasn’t even sure why he had pressed the button to unlock the door for Dean; he tried to tell him it was pure curiosity, but he knew part of him had wanted to see Dean again. Despite his best efforts, he hadn’t stopped thinking of Dean since their encounter in the coffee shop. This was getting dangerous. He had vowed never to be out of control of his body again, to never let himself be a slave to an alpha again. So why couldn’t he stop dwelling on how good Dean had looked in his suit, and how amazing he had smelled? Castiel felt his anxiety building, his heart thumping hard in his chest as he tried to recover from the encounter with Dean. He sucked in deep breaths, trying to suppress the panic attack that threatened to overtake him. He thought about the bottle of Klonopin in his cabinet. In any case, he tried to avoid taking it when he could; the drug tended to make him unfocused and easily confused. Castiel closed his eyes, continuing to regulate his breathing. The scent of the flowers he had thrown aside was cloying in his nostrils. Castiel opened his eyes, looking at the bouquet. It was large and expensive looking. Castiel assumed that Dean and gotten it from Anna’s shop downstairs. He wondered if he should ask her about the flowers, but then he decided he didn’t want her to know he had been the recipient. The bouquet was quite beautiful, like all of Anna’s work. He could ask her what the flowers meant at least, without seeming too suspicious. It would be a shame to thrown them out.

Castiel forced himself to get off the floor. He picked up the bouquet and put it beside the sink. _Don_ _’_ _t think about who they_ _’_ _re from. Anyways, they_ _’_ _re just flowers. You told him no._ Castiel told himself as he filled a vase with water. He unwrapped the flowers and took out his kitchen shears to trim the stems. He tried to put them in the vase, but the bouquet was so huge, he had to find another vase. He pushed the blooms around, trying to create some sort of arrangement. The perfume of the blossoms was heady and intoxicating. Castiel pushed them away, leaving them on the kitchen counter. _Maybe I should have thrown them away. All I can think about is him._ The business card Dean had placed in the bouquet had fallen out when Castiel separated the flowers. He picked it up gingerly, rubbing the smooth card stock between his fingers. He read the name and title.

Dean Winchester, Proprietor  
La Storia  
Fine Italian Dining

Below that was an address, phone number and email. The name _Winchester_ stared back at him, mocking him. _It_ _’_ _s not an uncommon surname_ , Castiel told himself. _It_ _’_ _s just a coincidence_. He shook his head, pushing the memories away. Castiel hadn't heard of La Storia, and was certain it was not the type of restaurant he usually frequented. This alpha was rich, like so many others of his kind. Castiel couldn’t help his curiosity though. He went to the laptop that sat on the kitchen table and opened it. A quick search for La Storiayielded a glossy looking webpage with spreads of artfully arranged dishes. There was a sample menu and descriptions. The restaurant boasted an extensive wine list and also house made desserts. Castiel’s stomach growled as he read about and looked at the pictures of the fresh handmade pastas. He realized he hadn’t eaten anything today except a bowl of cereal, and now it was getting close to dinnertime. Castiel took a quick look in his fridge and cabinets. Nothing except a box of Kraft mac and cheese. Well it was a far cry from the _fusilli alla umbriaco_ he could be having at La Storia. Castiel sighed. Maybe it was worth giving into Dean if he could get a gourmet meal out of the deal. Castiel shook his head. Hunger could make you desperate. He busied himself with preparing his sorry meal.


	3. Chapter 3

Dean was waiting outside of Castiel’s apartment. It was six in the morning and chilly. Dean shivered despite his layers of clothing and the long wool coat he wore on top of them. Dean had barely slept last night, tossing and turning and dreaming of plunging into Castiel’s slick, knotting him and marking him, making him completely his. His plan to take it slow with Castiel had gone out the window. Knowing that Castiel was at the beginning of his heat made him desperate. If he didn’t capture the omega now, he might have to wait another month. So here he was at the crack of dawn, loitering in front of Castiel’s building. He figured Castiel would have to venture outside at some point, or someone else who lived in the building, in which case Dean would just slip inside when that happened. While he waited, Dean picked up a coffee at the shop next door, sipping carefully at the hot beverage. Around 6:30, his patience was rewarded as a woman clad in running gear opened the front door. Dean stepped up to the entrance before she was able to leave.

“Good morning.” Dean put on his most charming smile, aware that the woman had already noted his attractiveness.

“Hello.” she answered, smiling back, and started to put her earbuds on.

“I was hoping to get into the building. I’m staying with a friend who lives here and..uh..lost my key for the front door.” Dean improvised, again flashing his smile. “I tried his cell but I think he’s still sleeping.” Dean managed to look embarrassed.

“Oh, no problem.” the woman responded cheerfully. She pulled her keys out and unlocked the door for Dean.

“Thanks so much.” Dean said gratefully. “Have a nice run.” He winked at her.

The woman blushed and jogged to the sidewalk, casting a backward glance at Dean. But Dean was already in the building, taking the steps up to Castiel’s apartment. He could already smell Castiel from the hallway, and his desire which was barely held in check threatened to overwhelm him. Dean wasn’t sure he could control himself when he was face to face with Castiel. He knocked on the door, wondering if Castiel was an early bird or if he slept in on the weekends. After a few minutes passed, there was no answer. Dean knocked harder, and waited another 5 minutes. No answer. Dean jiggled the doorknob. He was entertaining thoughts of breaking into the apartment and creeping into Castiel’s bed. But no, he didn’t want to do it that way. It was harder than usual to control the animalistic drive inside him, and Dean didn’t know if it was because it was Castiel or if it was because it had been so long since he had fucked anyone that he didn’t have to pay.

Dean was pacing outside the door when Castiel finally came out of his apartment. The wave of musk that passed over Dean almost completely destroyed his willpower. Castiel gaped when he saw Dean, and a brief flicker of fear passed over his features. His hair was sticking up in the back, a bit greasy and he was rubbing his eyes vigorously. He stayed halfway behind the door, but Dean had already taken in the boxers and ratty t-shirt that Castiel was wearing. The shirt had rucked up slightly and the waistband on the boxers were slung low, giving Dean a glimpse of the jut of perfect hipbones.

“How’d you get in?” Castiel said, trying to keep his voice steady.

“Hello Castiel.” Dean ignored the question and grinned, looking Castiel up and down. Castiel’s face reddened. “You look…good enough to eat.” Dean was literally drooling, and wiped the edge of his mouth with the back of his hand.

“I asked you to leave me alone.” Castiel said, his eyes widening, his anxiety level spiking. He gripped the door for support. “Don’t make me call the cops.”

“Don’t worry, _Cas_.” Dean said, lingering on Castiel’s name and making it sound obscene. “I meant what I said. I’m a man of honor.”

“That’s what all you alphas, say.” Castiel managed to say. He was about to slam the door closed, but Dean anticipated it, and stepped into the space between the half open door and the frame.

Dean smirked, his green eyes dark with lust and slowly traveling the length of Castiel’s body. He leaned against the frame, his posture relaxed and confident. Castiel couldn’t help inhaling Dean’s scent, and he felt his resolve weakening. He didn’t trust himself to respond.

“Just one dinner. I just want to talk.” Dean said easily.

Castiel remembered the pictures of the pasta from the website. _One dinner couldn_ _’_ _t hurt, could it?_ “Just dinner.” Castiel conceded. “No strings attached.”

Dean smiled broadly. “Excellent. I’ll pick you up at 7.”

“Um.” Castiel tried to think of an excuse. He was thinking he’d have more time to prepare, or maybe be able to put off the dinner until another date. As it was, he was worried that his suppression meds weren’t working. “I guess so.”

“I’ll see you later, Cas.” Dean winked, showing his brilliant white teeth again.

Castiel closed the door after Dean left, leaning against it and closing his eyes. Dean’s scent lingered, and Castiel couldn’t ignore it. To his horror, he felt his boxers getting damp with slick. Castiel was sure the last time it had happened had been before he had started the suppression treatment. Clearly it wasn’t working anymore. He felt the beginnings of a panic attack. _Deep breaths, Cas._ He needed to calm down. _What have you done?_

…

At 7 on the dot, the buzzer rang. Castiel grabbed his jacket and slipped his loafers on. He didn’t want Dean to come up to the apartment again. He took his time going down the stairs, not wanting to seem too eager. But the truth was, he had let his anticipation build as the day dragged on. As much as he tried to fight it, Dean was getting to him. His slick hadn’t stopped although it was manageable. Still, Castiel needed to put a pad on. He felt the need faintly pulsing inside him. It was not nearly as bad as when he hadn’t been on suppressants, but still, it was disturbing to Castiel when he hadn’t felt this way for so long. He took Klonopin in preparation of the night ahead.

“Cas…you look beautiful.” Dean greeted. Castiel was wearing dark jeans and a button down shirt, with a navy blazer on top.

“Thanks, Dean.” Castiel said. He looked Dean over, who was also dressed in jeans and a blazer, but instead had a fitted black tee underneath the jacket. “You look nice too.” He offered.

“Thanks, Cas.” Dean smiled and held the door open for Castiel. He place his hand in the small of Castiel’s back, guiding him down to the curb where the town car idled. Dean opened the car door for Castiel, and then went around to the other side to sit next to him in the back. The driver turned around and said hello politely to Castiel.

“Please take us to Storia, Benny.” Dean told him.

“No prob, Mr. Winchester.” Benny answered.

The ride was short, the traffic almost nonexistent on a Sunday night. Castiel huddled on his side of the car, feeling calm because of the Klonopin. Dean kept to his side of the car, and Castiel wondered if it was because of the driver, or if because he really was being respectful. When the car pulled up next the restaurant, Dean got out and opened Castiel’s door. He offered a hand to Castiel, who ignored it, not trusting himself to touch Dean.

The restaurant was painted a lovely warm yellow, and had quaint wooden framed windows. There was a small brick patio that was empty now. An artfully weathered sign read _La Storia_ in an extravagantly looped script. When they entered the restaurant, the delicious smells wafted over Castiel, who immediately felt like he was starving. Everyone noticed Dean coming in and several called hello to him. The maitre’d simpered as she spoke to Dean, telling him how busy it had been today. Dean touched her shoulder and thanked her, and then moved into the dining room, selecting an intimate booth in the far corner. The restaurant was dimly lit and candles in glass holders flickered on each table. The walls were a rich red, decorated with a series of black and white photographs of various places in Italy. The photo hanging above the booth showed a happy couple seated in a gondola looking at each other, the gondolier looking towards the photographer, his pole in the water, pushing them down the narrow canal, a bridge in the background framing the scene.

Dean gestured for Castiel to slide into the booth. Castiel did so, and was relieved when Dean sat and didn’t slide in too close to him. A waiter immediately brought water and a couple of glasses of wine.

“I don’t drink…” Castiel protested, when Dean raised his glass. He did drink occasionally, but he didn’t want to mix alcohol with the Klonopin he had taken. He had passed out the last time he had. Instead he picked up the water glass and clinked it with Dean’s wine glass.

“Cheers. To getting to know each other better.” Dean said. He took a sip and set down the glass. He sidled closer to Castiel, who tried not to move away. Dean was taking a deep breath.

“Jesus fuck you smell good.” Dean murmured, bending his head close to Castiel’s. Castiel felt his desire ratchet. Dean smelled good to him too, but Castiel stayed quiet, the slick trickling in his briefs. Dean sat back up, and Castiel relaxed.

“So, tell me about yourself.” Dean said casually, sipping at his wine again. A basket of bread appeared, along with a dish of olive oil. Dean thanked the waiter, and then tore a piece of focaccia in half and dipped it in the oil. “Try some, I sourced the oil myself directly from Italy.”

Castiel grabbed a small piece of the bread and dipped it lightly in the oil. He took a bite. “This is really good.”

“I’m glad you like it.” Dean smiled, showing his teeth. He watched Castiel intently as he chewed the bread, making the omega blush and look away. “So, tell me about yourself.” He prompted again.

“Not much to tell.” Castiel mumbled, toying with his water glass. “I work at a biotech company. You know where I live. I’m sure your private investigator told you everything already.”

Dean laughed. “I want to know the stuff I can’t find out from a detective - what your hobbies are, what your favorite ice cream flavor is.”

“Um. I like to read. I enjoy mint chocolate chip.” Castiel shrugged.

“Not much of a talker huh?” Dean sidled up to Castiel again, this time his thigh brushed against Castiel’s. “I wonder if you’re a screamer.” He whispered in Castiel’s ear. Castiel reddened, feeling a gush of slick. “You’re stinking up my restaurant.” Dean continued in a whisper. “If I wasn’t a gentleman, I’d be fucking your brains out in the bathroom right now.”

Castiel hitched a breath. Dean placed a palm on his thigh, near the juncture between his leg and groin. Castiel was having trouble focusing. The waiter brought a plate of _caprese_ \- mozzarella with tomato and basil, and Castiel was grateful for the distraction. The alpha had ordered for them of course, and in any case, Castiel doubted his ability to make even that type of decision at the moment. Dean moved his hand away, but looked at Castiel with darkened eyes. Castiel swallowed. His suppression meds may not be working completely but there were still doing something. Otherwise he would have already been in the bathroom letting Dean drill his cock into him. Speaking of the bathroom, Castiel needed to go. He excused himself, and Dean nodded, watching him as he moved to the back of the restaurant.

There was a small alcove where the bathrooms were. Castiel tried the handle for the door marked “M”. It was locked. He tried the other bathroom but it was also occupied. Castiel leaned against the wall and waited. He fidgeted, turning over the events of the evening so far. Dean hadn’t done anything _too_ inappropriate yet. Castiel thought he might have to call a taxi to get himself home though. He was certain that Dean would try to convince him to go to his place, and Castiel didn’t want to be dependent on Dean’s driver. The door to the bathroom opened, startling Castiel from his thoughts. A tall man wearing a pinstriped suit looked Castiel over, his nostrils flaring. He had the look and presence of an alpha.

“Hello.” The man drawled, his brown eyes focusing on Castiel’s face. “Don’t you smell and look delicious?”

“Um…” Castiel said, cursing the pheromones that broadcasted his need. Despite himself, he felt drawn toward this alpha.

The man stepped up close to Castiel, only inches between their faces. He put a hand out to grasp Castiel’s jaw so he could examine his neck for marks. “Doesn’t look like anyone’s claimed you.”

Castiel felt his knees buckling at the touch, his mind hazy while the man’s scent surrounded him. He knew he should push him away but he felt trapped. The alpha put his other hand on the wall beside Castiel’s head. He moved one leg between Castiel’s legs, pressing up so his thigh rubbed against Castiel’s crotch. Castiel couldn’t help the whimper that escaped his lips. He felt a gush of slick between his legs.

“You’re fucking ripe aren’t you?” The man rasped in his ear, letting his tongue dart out and taste Castiel’s ear. Castiel whined. The alpha moved the hand that was on Castiel’s jaw down to cup Castiel’s ass. He squeezed hard, making Castiel yelp.

“Please, I’m…here with someone.” Castiel managed, still pinned against the wall by the larger man.

“And where is this…someone?” the alpha replied. “He shouldn’t let his little omega out of his sight, not when you’re in that time of the month when you’d let anyone bend you over. Isn’t that right, omega?”

Castiel heard the growl before he saw Dean. Two hands grasped the alpha by the shoulders and pulled him off of Castiel. Castiel gasped as he watched Dean slam the other man against the wall.

“Stay the fuck away from him.” Dean snarled, baring his teeth at the other alpha. “He’s mine.”

The man’s shocked expression turned into a sneer. “They why haven’t you marked him? He’s walking around like a whore, ready to spread his legs for anyone.”

“Get the fuck out of my restaurant.” Dean slammed the man against the wall again for emphasis, and then released him.

The alpha brushed himself off and straightened his jacket. He glared at Dean and held himself proudly. As he walked away, he called a parting shot over his shoulder. “The food is terrible anyways.”

Dean wanted to go after the man and beat the crap out of him but he held himself in check. After all, he had customers in the restaurant, and he didn’t want to scare them away. He looked at Castiel, who was still leaning against the wall, his expression panicked. His blue eyes were teary and wide.

“Shhh.” Dean soothed, pulling Castiel to him, and Castiel collapsed against Dean. He felt comforted by the warmth and solidity of Dean’s chest. Dean stroked his back gently. “It’s ok, Cas.”

“Dean…” Castiel found himself burying his face in Dean’s shirt. He shuddered. The way that man had handled him, and the way he had just let him. If Dean hadn’t intervened, Castiel didn’t want to think about what he would have let the other alpha do to him. 

“It’s ok.” Dean repeated, still holding the omega. He felt a surge of protectiveness and possessiveness. Castiel wasn’t even his yet, but Dean was already starting to think of him that way. He held Castiel for a few more moments, shushing him as he snuffled into Dean’s chest and stroking his back. Castiel lifted his head, and looked at Dean with vulnerable eyes. Dean felt a pang in his heart, but let go of Castiel.

“You ok to go back and finish dinner?” Dean asked kindly. Castiel nodded. They went back to the table together, Dean guiding Castiel with a hand in the small of his back again.

For the rest of the meal, Dean didn’t mention the incident but talked about the restaurant and the various dishes. Castiel was grateful; he still felt shaken by his encounter with the alpha. As he listened to Dean describe how he had come to open La Storia, Castiel had a chance to try the _fusilli alla umbriaco_ he had ogled on the website yesterday. It was just as delicious as he had imagined, and Dean looked on with amusement and Castiel practically moaned as he ate the pasta. The somber mood that had settled on them both after the assault on Castiel lifted slightly. Castiel. Dean also kept space between them and didn’t try to touch him, to Castiel’s relief. He let himself relax a bit.

Towards the end of dinner, Dean excused himself to check on the kitchen. Castiel noticed that he spoke briefly to the waiter and the man hovered around Castiel after Dean left. Castiel smiled politely after assuring the waiter he didn’t need anything else. He glanced around the restaurant, which was mostly empty, now that it was close to nine. Castiel felt more clear-headed now that Dean wasn’t sitting next to him. He was still wary, but the way Dean had come swooping in to his rescue had made him wonder if Dean really was different. And he couldn’t deny the attraction, which had increased after Dean had saved him. He knew part of that was his omega nature responding to the alpha demonstrating his ability to protect the omega. The rational part said that Dean was a psychopath who wasn’t above stalking Castiel and hiring an investigator. But Castiel found that when Dean was in front of him, he had trouble thinking of reasons to say no. And now that Dean had rescued him, he must definitely expect something in return from Castiel. Castiel felt his anxiety rise at the thought. Especially after what had almost happened, he didn’t want to go home with an alpha, even if it was Dean. His body warred with his mind though, and now that Castiel had mostly recovered from the assault, he felt need pulsing through him again.

“Ready for dessert?” Dean asked, his eyes twinkling as he sat back down at the table. Castiel nodded, even though he was beyond full. As if on cue, the waiter brought out two slices of chocolate torte. Castiel’s dish had a scoop of mint chocolate chip next to the cake.

“Thank you, Dean.” Castiel said gratefully. This truly had been a delicious and decadent meal. Castiel couldn’t remember the last time he had gone to such a nice restaurant. He was sure he couldn’t afford it. He had assumed Dean would pick up the tab, especially since he was the owner. Castiel spooned a bit of the ice cream into his mouth. He hummed with contentment. Dean watched him eat the ice cream, making Castiel feel self-conscious. He blushed.

“I knew you would like it.” Dean observed, smiling at Castiel. Dean picked at his cake, while Castiel ate all the ice cream and half the cake on his dish. Two espressos were placed at their table; Dean drank his black in one gulp, while Castiel added sugar to his and sipped at it. Finally dinner was over. Dean was looking at him expectantly.

“Thanks so much for dinner, Dean.” Castiel repeated. He hoped that Dean wouldn’t press him, but he couldn’t forget the words he had snarled at the other alpha: _he_ _’_ _s mine._

Dean got up and offered his hand, which Castiel ignored. He stood up, all of a sudden feeling unsteady on his feet. Dean slung a shoulder under his arm to support him. Castiel felt dizzy, and leaned heavily on Dean as he guided him out of the restaurant. The employees were looking at Castiel with concern but Dean assured them everything was ok, and that Castiel had just drank too much. Once they were outside, Castiel felt slightly better, but everything was still spinning and he was stumbling on the sidewalk. Benny was waiting at the curb and opened the back door for them. Dean put him in the car and went to the other side to get in. Castiel slumped against the seats. Benny started driving, and within minutes Castiel was unconscious.


	4. Chapter 4

Castiel woke in an unfamiliar bed. He was naked except for his briefs, and thankfully still wearing a pad. Light was streaming into the room from the windows. Castiel sat up and groaned at the ache in his head. He looked around. The room was white and starkly furnished. A black and silver chest of drawers leaned against one wall, and directly across from the bed with a matching vanity with a massive rectangular mirror mounted above it. A door led off the bedroom into an _en suite_ bathroom. There was another mirror above the bed, and Castiel blushed at the implications. A glass of water sat on the nightstand beside the bed, but Castiel was wary about drinking it. His last memory of the night before was stumbling into the car with Dean. After that he drew a complete blank.

 _The fucker drugged me!_ Castiel was almost completely certain. _And after what happened last night with the other alpha too._ He forced himself to stand up, another wave of pain pulsing in his skull. He walked over to the window and looked out, not prepared for the sight of the city twenty stories below. _Where the hell am I?_ He walked over to the door and jiggled the handle. It was locked of course. Castiel walked into the bathroom. He peered at himself in the mirror, examining the layer of stubble on his face and the bloodshot appearance of his eyes. His hair was a greasy mess sticking in all directions. Castiel splashed water on his face and then went to the toilet. At least there was a supply of pads on the top of the toilet. Castiel changed himself and then washed his hands. He wondered if Dean had noticed his scars. They were on his shoulders and just below his neck, tracing along his collarbone and back. He had been bitten so many times he lost count. _But they left my neck untouched._

Castiel pushed the memory away forcibly. He wasn’t willing to go down that road. When that alpha had pinned him against the wall in the restaurant, it had almost been triggered, but the Klonopin had kept it at bay. But now it was impossible not to feel trapped and anxious. He felt the beginnings of a panic attack coming on. He sat down heavily on the bed, bracing his hands on his knees and leaning his head down, facing the floor. He took deep breaths, but he couldn’t help focusing on the tightness in his chest, and the velocity of his heartbeats. He almost shouted with fright when Dean suddenly opened the door; the sound of the bolt sliding out of the lock was overly loud to his ears in his anxious state.

“Hey Cas.” Dean smiled. “Up already?”

“Why are you doing this?” Castiel accused, glaring at Dean. He rubbed his temples, his head pounding even more fiercely.

“Doing what?” Dean said nonchalantly, sitting next to Castiel on the bed and placing a hand on the omega’s thigh. Castiel jerked away as if he had been burned. He stood up quickly, a spike of pain shooting through his head and making him unsteady on his feet. Dean reached out a hand to help him but Castiel stumbled out of reach.

“You fucking drugged me, took me to your home, and locked me up like a prisoner! You’re just like that other alpha!” Castiel shouted, fear and anxiety coursing through his body.

Castiel tried to cover his bare body with his hands. He was completely at Dean’s mercy. Dean got up calmly and stepped towards Castiel, who stepped backwards and found himself literally backed into a corner. Dean smiled slowly, his eyes dark with lust. He was a predator who had the leisure of playing with his prey before going in for the kill. He closed the space between them, inches between their faces. He placed his hands on either side of Castiel, trapping him between his arms, but still not touching him. Castiel was surrounded by Dean, the alpha’s musk filling his nostrils, and he felt himself weakening. His suppression didn’t seem to be there at all anymore. Dean locked Castiel in his gaze, and Castiel felt his arousal growing. He felt a gush of slick in his underwear.

“You want me.” Dean said matter-of-factly. “You want me to mark you and knot you and make you come over and over again until you pass out from pleasure.”

Castiel whimpered despite himself. He was already hard and he felt so much need. But he was damaged goods; when Dean found out he wouldn't want him. It was one of the reasons he had given up on finding a mate and worked so hard to suppress himself and assimilate as a beta. Dean bent his head down to Castiel’s neck but was careful not to touch him. Dean inhaled deeply, and Castiel closed his eyes, his need intensifying and his slick coming steadily now. He lifted his head and looked into Castiel’s eyes. Castiel saw that Dean’s eyes were fully dilated, the green of his irises a thin ring around his dark pupils.

“You can’t deny it, Cas. Don’t fight it anymore.” Dean murmured. “But I respect you. I won’t do anything you don’t want.”

Dean’s words broke the spell. “Really?” Castiel laughed incredulously. He shook his head. “You drug me and kidnap me. And you say you’re not doing anything I don’t want?”

“You wouldn’t listen. I had to.” Dean said, confident that he was in the right.

“You are completely out of your mind. And alphas don’t ever ask for consent. You just take what you want. It doesn’t matter how sweet your words are, or that you took me for dinner first. I don’t owe you anything, just because I’m an omega.” Castiel said bitterly. “If you mean what you say, take me home.”

“I can’t.” Dean growled. “You know how much you are testing my self-control. I’m trying to be patient.” Dean balled his hands into fists where they rested on the walls. “And after that other alpha tried to claim you for his own…”

“I would have been fine.” Castiel said, injecting false bravado into his voice. “You can wait forever, it won’t change how I feel.”

“I think it will.” Dean said confidently. “I can smell how aroused you are, I know your panties are wet with slick.” Dean leaned in again, careful not to touch Castiel. “I don’t think your suppression is working anymore, Cas.” Castiel shuddered.

“What did you do?” Castiel whimpered. He was feeling completely out of control, his mind focusing only on Dean’s scent, the closeness of his body. He hated feeling this way. It was why he had been ruined.

“Sleeping pills weren’t the only thing I put in the ice cream.” Dean confessed without remorse.

“You’re a monster.” Castiel whispered. He felt the fight going out of him. “And I knew you were no different than the others.”

“But yet you still took my flowers, and you still came to dinner.” Dean reminded him. “So I knew you wanted it too. I just gave you an extra…push. I couldn’t wait any longer. I didn’t want to miss the peak of your cycle.”

“You won’t want me, when you know how ruined I am.” Castiel said weakly. It was his last chance to get out of this mess.

“I want you any way you are. Jesus, Cas. Do you know how much I wanted you from the moment I first scented you.” Dean growled.

“Look at my scars, Dean.” Castiel said quietly. “What do you think happened? What do you think happens to omegas that no one wants?”

“I don’t care.” Dean said fiercely.

“I can’t have children, Dean. Ever. Please let me go.” Castiel gritted.

“I don’t care. Cas. I don’t even want children.” Dean snarled. Castiel cowered at his anger. When Dean moved his hand, Castiel flinched. But Dean only moved it near Castiel’s face. And finally, Dean touched Cas, with one hand gently, even tenderly, on his cheek. Castiel was bewildered. He thought for sure Dean would be repulsed and let him go.

“Cas.” Dean murmured. “I’ll give you time. I’ll give you space. But I can’t let you go. I need you.” He removed his hand, and Castiel felt bereft. Dean smiled at Cas and stepped away.

“Dean..” Castiel said uncertainly, but Dean was moving towards the door now.

“I’ll bring you some food. Get cleaned up..there are clothes that should fit you in the drawer.” Dean said coolly, no trace of desperation or tenderness in his voice.

Dean left the room, shutting the door and sliding the lock home. Castiel slid down the wall and sat heavily on the rug. He buried his face in his hands and sobbed. And still, his need and desire grew.

…

Castiel had showered, and when he came out of the bathroom with a towel slung around his hips, Dean was waiting on the bed with a tray of food. His eyes followed Castiel’s movements as he pulled out clothes from the dresser, but he stayed seated. Castiel went back into the bathroom to change, his heart thumping hard. When he was in the shower, he had calmed himself. Seeing Dean in the room had triggered him his anxiety again. He pulled on his clothes and braced himself, sitting on the toilet and taking deep breaths. He was tempted to stay locked inside, but he knew Dean would just unlock it.

“Hi Cas.” Dean said serenely. Cas’ scents were diminished after the shower, but it wouldn’t take long before they were full force again. It made it easier to be in the omega’s presence without the danger of losing control.

“Dean.” Castiel replied, trying to remain impassive. He made no move towards the bed.

“I’ll let you eat, Cas.” Dean said, getting up. “I’ll be back to check on you later.”

Castiel was surprised. He had expected Dean to watch him eat. Dean smiled reassuringly and left the room, closing the door quietly. Castiel heard the slide of the bolt. He looked at the tray, which contained a sandwich and some fruit, as well as a bottle of water. Castiel drank the water greedily but left the food untouched. He felt exhausted and emotionally drained. The need to be knotted still pulsed inside him, warring with his body’s desire for sleep. He put the tray on the floor and climbed into the bed. As he wrapped himself in the blankets though, he found it difficult to sleep, instead turning over Dean’s actions and words in his mind. He was wary of Dean’s “kindness”. He knew what the alpha wanted, and to be honest, part of him wanted the same now that he wasn’t suppressed anymore. But he wasn’t delusional enough to think this would end well. There was another alpha that had been “kind” to him so many years ago that taught him the lesson the hard way.

...

“Cas!” Dean said loudly. He shook the omega, who was screaming and fighting with the tangle of blankets. His eyes were closed and tears ran down his cheeks. He was covered in sweat. “Cas! Wake up!”

Castiel opened his eyes and started. Dean was looking at him with concern. The alpha holding his shoulders. Castiel blinked and looked around with confusion.

“Was it a nightmare?” Dean asked. “You were flailing around and screaming.”

Castiel wiped his eyes and then his brow. He didn’t speak or move. He looked at Dean, pain and anguish in his eyes.

“What is it?” Dean said worriedly. “Tell me.”

Castiel seemed to realize where he was suddenly, and jerked out of Dean’s grasp. He sat up and scrambled away from Dean on the bed. The memory had overwhelmed him, and Castiel was exhausted. He was an omega and he didn’t deserve any better. No amount of suppression would ever change his nature. He would be taking medication for the rest of his life, until he made it past his fertile years, and stopped having heat cycles. But that could be twenty years away, and Castiel felt despair at the thought. He wouldn’t be the first omega that had committed suicide because of the poor hand that nature had dealt them. Even as these thoughts ran through his head, Castiel felt his body yearning for Dean. He was at the peak of his cycle, and Dean knew it too. Castiel wondered why the alpha didn’t just take him. Castiel stared at the ceiling. His reflection startled him, he had forgotten about the mirror. He glanced over at Dean, who was sitting on the edge of the bed.

“Let me go.” Castiel begged. “I’m broken.”

Dean looked at Castiel with compassion but he shook his head. “No.”

He waited for Castiel to rage against him. Instead, the omega sagged and turned to lie face down on the bed with a defeated air. Dean felt sorrow at the sight of Castiel surrendering to his fate. In the restaurant, he suspected that he was starting to care for Castiel as more than just another conquest. When that other alpha had tried to stake a claim, Dean had felt rage like he hadn’t for years, and he knew that he wanted Castiel for more than a night. But to see the fight go out of the omega made him hesitate. Dean found Castiel's defeated air disheartening; his resistance to Dean was one of the things that had attracted him in the first place. But Dean’s biology wouldn’t let him release Castiel, even if he felt protective of him.

“Just knot me and get it over with.” Castiel said apathetically. “You don't even need to claim me.”

“No.” Dean said forcefully.

It was taking all his willpower not to touch Castiel; if he was ten years younger it would be impossible to hold himself in check. He did respect Castiel, despite what the omega might think. And he would never take anyone in the state Castiel was in, no matter how desperate they both were. The omega had clearly been having a nightmare, and Dean wanted to know what it was. The room was stinking of Castiel, his sweat had made his musk permeate the air. Dean made himself breathe through his mouth.

“Tell me.” Dean prompted. “I want to know. I don't just want to knot you. I do want to claim you. I want you to be mine.”

Castiel lifted his head and looked over at Dean incredulously. “If I tell you, you won't want anything to do with me.”

“Try me.” Dean challenged. “I told you I don't care, Cas.”

Castiel laughed bitterly. “You'll let me go afterwards, I'm sure of it.” Even as he spoke the words, he wondered if he really did want to go. He had never had anyone say those words, _I want you to be mine_ , to him.

Dean reached for Castiel, but merely took his hand gently. Castiel met his eyes, and only saw sincerity there. Dean squeezed his hand lightly and let go.

“Castiel.” Dean said. “Whatever it is, I promise I won't let you go.

Castiel hesitated. Something had shifted in their dynamic. Dean seemed to genuinely want to know. It had been so long since Castiel had told his story. Only two other people knew: his brother Gabriel and his therapist. Maybe it was time someone else knew. If Dean really wanted to be his mate, he would have to know eventually. If Dean still wanted Castiel afterwards, maybe he was sincere about his desire to be with Castiel. If Castiel was right, Dean would let him go. Castiel sat up and took a deep breath. Dean nodded in encouragement and remained seated beside him, but made no move to touch him.

Castiel began his story quietly. “It happened when I was twenty. I had been working for a pimp when he found me. John was an alpha with a family. He was kind to me, and I thought eventually he'd leave his family so we could be mates...”

…

 _“_ _Omega slut._ _”_ _The voice was cruel and mocking. Castiel cringed._

 _“_ _He stinks of desperation. He must be mid-cycle._ _”_ _Another voice added excitedly._ _“_ _Where have you been hiding him, John? He'_ _s gorgeous._ _”_

 _“_ _He wasn't_ _ready for_ _…_ _this before._ _”_ _A familiar voice answered. It was John_  ' _s voice._

_Castiel was blindfolded and couldn't_ _see who else was talking. He was naked, kneeling on the rug in the hotel room. He felt John's_ _hand at his neck, stroking lightly and possessively.  The air was heavy with the musk of arousal. Castiel could still separate John's_ _scent from that of the other alphas. His anxiety was overpowering his need to be knotted and claimed. When John had mentioned a special surprise, Castiel had thought that John was finally going to make him his mate. He had been knotted many times by John but the alpha had refused to mark him. He had been so excited when John had brought him to the hotel room. He was a little confused when John asked him to strip and kneel, and then blindfolded him. John wasn't_ _interested in playing around when they fucked, he liked to just get to the point. Castiel wondered if that was the surprise, and waited for the alpha to touch him.  Instead, John told Castiel to wait and then left the room. He was aching to be claimed, his slick leaking down his legs steadily, his cock constantly hard and leaking. He wasn't_ _sure how long he waited there, goose bumps on his bare skin, when suddenly John was back in the room, but he wasn't alone. Castiel heard footsteps, and sensed them surrounding him. He heard the low murmur of admiring male voices._

_Now his blindfold was being lifted, and he saw that he was surrounded by three men, including John, all alphas. The other two were unfamiliar to him. Fear thrilled through his body as he saw them eyeing him hungrily. This was a bad situation. He had trusted John. He loved John. But now he saw how little he meant to the alpha._

_“_ _John?_ _”_ _Castiel asked, his voice quavering. He looked up at John, but the alpha's_ _expression was cold._ _“_ _What- what's_ _going on?_ _”_

_But Castiel already knew. He had heard of alphas sharing an omega, taking turns until the omega was as good as dead. He just hadn't_ _ever expected it to happen to him. John had been a rough lover, but he had always been kind to Castiel previously. He lavished Castiel with praise and endearments, and also bought him little presents. They had all been lies. Sweet lies that had probably always been leading up to this moment._

_“_ _Dear one._ _”_ _John said, a sneer playing on his lips._ _“_ _I brought some friends to play._ _”_ _The alpha gripped the nape of Castiel_  's _neck._

 _“_ _No_ _…”_ _Castiel protested, his anxiety spiking as John held him in place._ _“_ _I don't_ _want to play. John, please._ _”_ _Castiel begged._

 _“_ _Mouthy little bitch, isn't_ _he?_ _”_ _One of the others drawled._ _“_ _Let me take him first._ _”_

 _“_ _Patience, Alistair._ _”_ _John said. Castiel tried to make a break for it, pulling out of John's_ _grasp. The alpha was too strong and fast for him and grabbed him easily by the waist._

 _“_ _Don't_ _make me tie you up, dear one._ _”_ _John chided, making Castiel kneel once again, and pressing a hand down on one shoulder. From his pocket, John pulled out a large dildo. He threw it at one of the alphas, who caught it with a grin._ _“_ _You first, Lucifer._ _”_

 _“_ _You're_ _a pretty little thing._ _”_ _the man said, brandishing the toy in front of Castiel's_ _f_ _ace._ _“_ _Let's_ _see how you take this._ _”_

_John stepped aside and let Lucifer take charge. Castiel's_ _heart was hammering in his chest. He was near tears, but John ignored him. Lucifer pushed Castiel down to the rug so he was on all fours. He crouched down behind him and wrenched Castiel's_ _legs apart. Alistair crowded close to look as well, but stayed out of Lucifer's_ _way._

_“_ _Look at how wet you are._ _”_ _Lucifer praised. Without warning, the alpha plunged the dildo into Castiel, who cried out with pain and surprise. He started fucking Castiel with the toy roughly, and to his embarrassment, Castiel starting pushing back on it._

 _“_ _Jesus, what a fucking slut."_ _Alistair admired, his voice rough with lust._

_Castiel couldn't h_ _elp the moans that escaped his throat. Maybe this would turn out ok, maybe they would just play with him a little and then let him go. But now John was guiding him back onto his knees, while Lucifer continued to pound him. John pulled a chair up in front of Castiel and motioned for Alistair to sit._

_“_ _No, please John. I don't_ _want to._ _”_ _Castiel begged. He started to cry. John shook his head and the other alpha unzipped his pants. John pulled Castiel's_ _hair so his mouth was level with Alistair's_ _cock._

 _“_ _Suck him._ _”_ _John commanded. Castiel shook his head, turning away from the alpha in the chair._

_John slapped him. Castiel cried out in pain. Tears ran freely down his face now. He was shocked and heartbroken. John had never raised a hand to him, in all the months they had spent together. John sneered at him._

_“_ _Did you think I loved you? That I'd_ _claim you? I already claimed an omega once, and she gave me two pups. I have no interest in mating again._ _”_ _John laughed._ _“_ _No, dear one._ _”_

_Castiel didn't_ _look at him. It didn't_ _matter what happened to him now, he didn't_ _care. Whatever else they did to him, John had already broken him with his cruelty. He continued to cry silently._ _Even Lucifer had stilled his movements when John slapped him._

_“_ _Suck him._ _”_ _John ordered again. Castiel guided Alistair's_ _cock into his mouth. He moved too slowly for the alpha'_ _s taste though, and soon the man was grabbing the back of his head and forcing Castiel_ _m'south onto his cock. Castiel gagged silently, the tears still streaming down his cheeks. Lucifer started hammering him again. Castiel shut his eyes tight._

_…_

_Castiel woke to an empty room. He was sore and battered and bloody. The three alphas had taken turns with him, using their cocks, hands, toys, fucking him at both ends. They had bit him, but never on the neck. And none of them had knotted him, instead coming on his body, until every inch of him was covered in cum. Even his hair and eyelashes were sticky. Eventually Castiel had passed out. Castiel groaned as he prodded himself, feeling sharp pain in his side. He needed medical attention. He managed to crawl over to the phone and dial 911. After he hung up the phone, he grabbed a sheet off the bed to cover himself, and waited for the ambulance to arrive._

_…_

_Castiel had been in the hospital for a couple of days when Gabriel showed up. His older beta brother pulled up a chair by Castiel's_ _bed._

_“_ _You look like shit._ _”_ _Gabriel said lightly, but the concern in his eyes contrasted with his words. Castiel had two black eyes, a split lip, and his ribs were bound. There were stitches in several places on his shoulders and upper chest. He was gaunt and pale faced, and an IV drip was secured to one arm._

 _“_ _How did you find out?_ _”_ _Castiel muttered._

 _“_ _Mom called me._ _”_ _Gabriel answered._ _“_ _The hospital contacted them._ _”_

 _“_ _And she couldn't_ _come herself._ _”_ _Castiel said bitterly. He looked at the ceiling, angry tears pooling in his eyes. He had been estranged from his parents since he was 15, when he had found out he was an omega. It had been years since he had seen his parents but he thought at least his mom would come see him, if she knew he had been so badly hurt._

 _“_ _You know how they are. I bet Dad wouldn't_ _let her._ _”_ _Gabriel shrugged. He placed a hand on Castiel's_ _arm._ _“_ _Do you need a place to stay? After you get out?_ _”_ _Gabriel added kindly._

 _Castiel met his brother's_ _eyes._ _“_ _I don'_ _t want to bother you. And what will people think if you bring an omega home?_ _”_

 _“_ _Cas. You'_ _re my brother. I don't_ _give a fuck._ _”_ _Gabriel said fiercely._

 _Castiel had stayed on and off with Gabriel through the years, but the last time he had done so, they had been the target of a hate crime. Gabriel_  's _car windows had been smashed and his tires slashed, and the words_ _“_ _Omega Lover_ _”_ _had been keyed into the hood. Gabriel had shrugged it off saying that he had wanted a new car anyways, but Castiel left the next day._

 _“_ _I don't_ _want to put you through that crap again._ _”_ _Castiel replied stubbornly._

 _“_ _Cas, you need to get help. Let me help you. There's_ _tons of omegas that pass as betas. Suppression meds have come a long way._ _”_ _Gabriel argued._

 _“_ _They'_ _re expensive._ _”_ _Castiel countered._ _“_ _I'_ _m fine._ _”_ _The truth was, he had been thinking about suppression for awhile. After what John had done to him, it seemed like an obvious decision._

 _“_ _You'_ _re not fine. You could be dead._ _”_ _Gabriel said quietly._ _“_ _I'_ _ll pay for the meds. I'll_ _help you through it._ _”_ _He grabbed his brother'_ _s hand and squeezed._

 _A woman came to the door, bearing a clipboard. She flipped through the pages, skimming the information. Knocking lightly on the half open door, she stepped in._ _“_ _Castiel?_ _”_

 _“_ _Yes?_ _”_ _Castiel asked._

 _The doctor moved to the bed._ _“_ _I'm_ _Dr. Joanna Harvelle. I'_ _m the head of the OBGYN department._ _”_ _She smiled and offered her hand to shake. She introduced herself to Gabriel as well and then looked back at Castiel._ _“_ _How are you feeling?_ _”_

 _“_ _Fine._ _”_ _Castiel lied._

 _“_ _Good. I'_ _m here to give you your exam._ _”_ _Dr. Harvelle explained._ _“_ _They already did one when they admitted you, but I'_ _m here to see how you'_ _re healing up._ _”_ _She looked over at Gabriel._ _“_ _Could you step outside of the room?_ _”_

 _Gabriel nodded and waved to Castiel._ _“_ _I'_ _m going to grab some coffee. I'_ _ll come back and check on you._ _”_

_..._

_The news shocked Castiel. He hadn'_ _t thought about children much in the past, although he had been careful to always use birth control, and was currently on the pill. When Gabriel came in, he was still stunned. When he told his brother, Gabriel started to cry. The sight of his normally stoic brother crumbling jolted Castiel out of his daze, and he started to weep. Gabriel held him and rocked him until he quieted._

_When his tears had dried, Castiel had made up his mind. He would suppress himself._


	5. Chapter 5

Castiel finished his story, and closed his eyes. He had not stopped or looked at Dean as he recalled his rape. He had started crying when he described how the alphas had used him, but his voice remained steady. When he finally opened his eyes and looked at Dean, he was stunned to see the alpha crying openly. Castiel didn't think alphas cried, at least not in front of others.

“I am so, so sorry, Castiel.” Dean said sorrowfully. He reached for Castiel's hand again, holding it in his hand and stroking lightly with his thumb.

“It wasn't you who did this to me.” Castiel said quietly. His own tears had stopped when he saw Dean crying.

“Cas. You gotta believe me when I say I would never do anything remotely like that to you.” Dean said vehemently, still holding on to Castiel's hand. “I have never ever abused an omega.”

Castiel stared into those wet green eyes, and he didn't doubt Dean's words. He still waited for Dean to tell him he was free to go.

“So now you know.” Castiel commented. He pulled his hand gently out of Dean's hand.

Dean sniffed and wiped his eyes. He shook his head slowly. He seemed to recover himself and then snarled with anger. “I would kill those animals if I knew who they were. They had no right.”

Castiel started at Dean's sudden change in demeanor. He could feel the rage radiating off of Dean, and saw how the alpha had his fists balled at his sides.

“It's ok, Dean.” Castiel murmured, and now he was the one reaching for Dean's hand. Dean seemed to relax when Castiel touched him. Castiel held Dean's hand lightly, but Dean squeezed firmly.

“I want to make it right.” Dean said fiercely. “Tell me their names. I'll rip their throats out.”

“It's not yours to make right, Dean.” Castiel replied.

“I can find out who they are.” Dean threatened.

“Please don't.” Castiel said.

He looked beseechingly into Dean's eyes. He hadn't meant for his story to make Dean thirsty for vengeance on his behalf. It was touching; Dean had nothing to do with what had happened so many years ago. Castiel found himself reevaluating Dean again. The alpha blew out a breath and relaxed. He still held on to Castiel's hand. They stared at each other. In spite of, or perhaps because of Castiel's revelation of his painful past to Dean, the air was suddenly thick with their unconsummated desire for each other. The distractions and barriers between them were gone. But they were both cautious and careful with each other. Castiel waited for Dean to initiate.

“I still want you. Damaged or not.” Dean murmured. “If you'll have me.” He paused before continuing. “I understand why you hate all alphas now, and I am sorry that I took you to my home against your will. I will let you go if that is what you really wish.”

Castiel was speechless. Of all the outcomes from telling his sorry tale, he had not expected this. All he could do was look at Dean, not quite believing the alpha. There was no guile in Dean's eyes.

“Cas.” Dean said softly, and placed a hand on Castiel's cheek.

Castiel closed his eyes and leaned into the touch. It had been so long since anyone had touched him with such tenderness.

“Stay with me, Cas.” Dean begged softly. “Be my mate.”

Castiel still couldn't respond. He felt dazed, the need in him building as he tried to process what Dean was saying. Dean leaned in and kissed him gently.

“Say yes, Cas.” Dean urged. He rubbed Castiel's hand with his thumb.

“Yes.” Castiel whispered.

He surged up to Dean's mouth, pressing his lips roughly against the alpha's mouth. Dean groaned and Castiel pushed his tongue inside. Dean pushed gently at Castiel's shoulder so he lay back on the bed. He covered the omega's body with his own, nuzzling at Castiel's neck and inhaling deeply. He licked and nipped at Castiel's neck, making the omega moan and writhe under him. Dean reached between their bodies and slid his hand into Castiel's pants, palming his erection. Castiel whined with need as Dean rubbed at his cock. Dean dipped his hand lower and felt the slick that was pooling in Castiel's underwear. He teased at Castiel's hole, pressing one finger inside gently. Castiel gasped and lifted his hips against Dean. Dean pulled his hand away, now sticky with Castiel's fluids. He lifted his head and looked at Castiel, making sure the omega watched as Dean licked the slick from his fingers.

“Fuck. You taste even better than you smell.” Dean admired, and put his fingers against Castiel's mouth. Castiel sucked on them obligingly. “Mmmm. Good boy.” Dean groaned and Castiel mewled in response.

He pulled his fingers away and rolled off of Castiel. Dean reached down to tug at Castiel's pants. He dragged them off along with Castiel's briefs, admiring how Castiel had soaked through them. Castiel continued to leak, dripping onto the bed sheets. Dean kneeled between Castiel's legs and nudged the omega's legs apart. He was doing his best to be gentle, especially after all Castiel had just told him. He leaned down and kissed Castiel's cock lightly, making the omega twitch and whine. He palmed Castiel's ass and then spread him so he could examine Castiel's weeping hole.

“You're beautiful, Cas.” Dean praised. He bent his head again and licked at the slick that was continuously trickling out of the omega. Castiel whimpered, and dug his hands into the sheets. Dean pressed his tongue into Castiel's opening, and the omega bucked against his face. Dean groaned and pressed harder with his tongue, swirling it inside.

“Dean!” Castiel cried out, as Dean continued to thrust his tongue inside and slurp up the slick. He glanced up at the ceiling as Dean devoured him. His breath caught as he watched Dean moving his head between his legs; it made him feel so wanton and debauched. The omega lifted his hips and pressed back against Dean, who plunged his tongue in as far as he could. Castiel whined and then reached his hands to push at Dean's head.

Dean lifted his head, and Castiel protested as the alpha moved his mouth away. “Too demanding.” Dean chided. He pressed a finger inside Castiel. Castiel threw his head back and moaned, pressing back against the alpha.

“More please, more, Dean!” Castiel pleaded. Dean added another finger and started thrusting into Castiel's slick, pressing hard against the omega's walls. Castiel begged for more and Dean obliged, until he had four fingers pumping in and out of the omega's greedy hole. Dean loved the feel of Castiel clenching around his hand, but his cock had been neglected and he was ready to bury it inside Castiel's ass. Castiel looked up at the mirror again and watched Dean’s hand thrusting in and out of himself. Dean noticed him looking and grinned wickedly.

“You like my mirror, do you Cas?” Dean panted, looking up at the mirror too. Their eyes met in the mirror and Castiel mewled with need.

“Let me fuck you and knot you.” Dean grunted as he continued to plunge his hand in and out of Castiel.

Castiel's wild eyes met Dean's and he nodded. Dean pulled his hand away and pressed it into the omega's mouth, making Castiel taste himself. Castiel moaned around Dean's fingers, licking and sucking them clean. Dean groaned and then pulled his hand away. He pulled off Castiel's shirt, his eyes briefly noting his scars before he moved on to disrobing himself. It was hard to see them now, knowing where they had come from, but Dean pushed down the anger that surged at the sight of the marks. Right now he had a needy omega in need of a knotting.

“Please Dean.” Castiel said, spreading his legs wide and lifting his hips. Castiel stared at Dean's massive cock, biting his lip as he saw how large it was.

Dean murmured appreciatively at the sight of Castiel and pounced, making the omega yelp in surprise. He slung Castiel's legs over his shoulders and positioned himself at Castiel's wet entrance.

“You're mine.” Dean growled. He pressed his cock against Castiel and slid in easily; Castiel's slick was everywhere. The omega cried out as Dean entered, and Dean gasped as he plunged into Castiel's wetness. He was fully seated now, and he held himself there, wrapping his arms around Castiel. He kissed the omega gently, and Castiel sighed. Dean started rocking as he held Castiel, and they both groaned at the feel of Dean's cock inside Castiel.

“Harder, Dean.” Castiel begged, trying to push on the alpha's chest. “I want you to fuck me harder. Slam your cock into me, fill me up.”

Dean closed his eyes and shuddered. He wasn't expecting Castiel to be so demanding. He moved back to his knees and then pulled his cock out to the tip, leaving the head still inside. He met Castiel's desperate eyes, and then surged forward, thrusting hard into Castiel. The omega yelped. They both looked up to the ceiling, enjoying the sight of Dean’s cock sliding almost all the way out and then all the way back into Castiel’s ass.

“More, please!” Castiel urged. He pressed his hips upward.

Dean groaned at Castiel's neediness. He started pumping in and out of Castiel roughly, and the omega sobbed with pleasure. Dean moaned as he slid in and out of Castiel's tight and hungry hole. He changed the angle of his thrusts slightly and Castiel's moaned loudly. He kept pounding the omega's sensitive spot and watched as Castiel went slack with pleasure.

“Dean, I'm going to-” Castiel started to warn Dean but then he was already coming, his cum spurting out of his cock and onto his stomach. Dean started slamming into Castiel harder, prolonging the waves of pleasure for the omega. As he watched Castiel orgasm and felt the omega's walls clenching his cock, Dean's knot started to swell at the base of his cock. Castiel's eyes widened as he also felt Dean's knot starting to grow. Dean moved Castiel's legs off his shoulders and pulled his cock out, Castiel protesting. He flipped the omega so he was on his stomach.

“Get on all fours.” Dean commanded. Castiel obeyed readily, presenting himself to Dean. Dean slid inside again, and they both groaned buried himself to the hilt. He started fucking into Castiel again, Castiel grunting as Dean could move deeper and harder in this position. Dean groaned as it became more difficult to move in and out of Castiel because of the knot. The knot swelled to its full size and Dean could only rock into Castiel now, and they both moaned with pleasure. Dean moaned as he felt his orgasm building as he continued to move with Castiel, joined together by his knot.

“Cas!” Dean sobbed, his eyes rolling back as he jerked against Castiel, filling the omega with his cum. He pushed himself deep, continuing to spurt his seed inside of Castiel. The omega whimpered and bucked against the alpha as he pumped him full of cum.

“Dean! Oh..God!” Castiel cried out as he came again, grinding back against Dean's knot. Dean grunted and finished emptying himself as he felt Castiel peak. He dipped his head down to Castiel's neck. He nipped the omega hard, causing him to cry out again.

“You're mine.” Dean growled possessively. “Mine.”

“Yours.” Castiel said breathlessly. He bared his neck to Dean as their movements slowed. They were still joined together by Dean's knot. Dean bent his head down and kissed Castiel's neck. He bit down, and Castiel yelped. Dean bit hard enough to draw blood and taste it. He lifted his head and admired his handiwork.

“Now everyone knows.” Dean said with satisfaction. “You belong to me.”

“Dean...” Castiel murmured. He touched his neck in disbelief, and saw the blood on his fingers as he pulled it away. He turned to look back at Dean. The alpha's lips were bloodied as well, and as Castiel watched, Dean licked the blood away.

“Mine.” Dean said fiercely. He tasted Castiel's neck, cleaning the wound and sucking the blood away. He slung one arm under Castiel's stomach and then turned them both to their sides, so Dean could curl around Castiel while they were still knotted.

“Yours...” Castiel said sleepily, still not quite believing what had happened. He sighed contently, the throb of the wound at his neck reminding him that it was real.

Dean rested his chin in the space between Castiel's neck and shoulder and kissed the omega's ear.  He pulled Castiel close to him. The knot could last for hours, but they could sleep while joined. Castiel heard Dean snoring softly. He looked up at the mirror, seeing how Dean’s body curved around his body, how perfectly they slotted together.

“Mine.” Castiel whispered, burrowing back into Dean's warm embrace.

…

Castiel lost count of how orgasms he had. The knot lasted for a few hours, and Dean woke him after they had only been asleep for one. Dean continued to fill Castiel until finally the knot subsided and released them both. They slept until the morning, and then had sex again, Dean knotting Castiel again. He bit Castiel again at the same spot, making sure that the mark would be obvious. They made a terrible mess of the bed, covering it in slick and cum. They moved to the bathroom to clean off and inevitably, Dean knotted him again. They only paused for sleep and food. Castiel felt drunk on the hormones that flooded his body as Dean took him again and again. It felt like being in love.


	6. Chapter 6

On the third day, Castiel's heat finally dissipated, and he started to reject Dean's advances. Dean took it in stride, but he couldn't keep his hands off his omega mate. He was happy, where he had only been content before. He hadn't realized what he had missed before he found Castiel. He had thought that a successful career, a few friends, and an occasional lover were enough; now he knew that he had just been complacent, jaded by the bad relationships he had been surrounded by. At the age of 37, he felt like a lovesick teenager.

For his part, once the heat had passed and the hormones left his system, Castiel was cautiously happy. He worried that Dean might lose interest, despite his assurances and promises, and most importantly, the fact that they had mated, and Dean had marked and claimed him. What if Dean changed his mind about children in the future? Would he leave Castiel for another omega who could give him a family? Castiel didn't mention any of his worries to Dean. The alpha doted on him, making his favorite foods and taking him around the town, to restaurants and shows, to stores that Castiel could have never afforded on his own. And mostly, Castiel _was_ happy.

He knew he would never be able to go back to his former job, and he felt regret that he was unemployable as an omega. When he mentioned it to Dean, he had said that he had already taken care of it and told Castiel's former employer that he had quit. Castiel was slightly taken aback by that, but he knew it was for the best. Dean asked Castiel to move in, and he had Benny take care of moving Castiel's few belongings into the penthouse. Most of them ended up in storage though; Dean had everything, there was no need for Castiel's cheap furnishings or even his old clothes. Castiel felt like his old life was being erased, and mostly, he didn't miss it. But he didn't have the freedom that he had when he presented as a beta. Now he had to be escorted by Dean wherever he went.

But Dean had a job, and although he could make his own hours and didn't have to be at the restaurant often, Castiel was jealous. He didn't just want to be Dean's mate. He wanted to have an identity outside of that. He tried to argue that he could go back on suppressants and go back to work, but Dean said it was out of the question. Wasn't Castiel happy? Dean would ask. And Castiel would look at that beautiful face and the loving green eyes, and he would say yes. He wasn’t lying, especially when his heats came on. He was blissfully happy when Dean spent those days tied together with him, the outside world forgotten. Dean spoiled Castiel, taking them on trips to quaint bed and breakfasts on the weekends, or for longer trips to luxury resorts when his work allowed. They even went to Italy so Dean could get inspiration for new dishes for the restaurant. But Castiel was only momentarily appeased. As soon as they got home, the discontent overwhelmed him again.

One evening, when Dean was at the restaurant, Castiel was roaming the large penthouse by himself. He knew he shouldn't invade Dean's privacy, but he was bored, and Dean hadn't told him much about his childhood. There must be family pictures somewhere. Dean was closemouthed about his father, only saying he was an asshole and he had died a couple of years ago. He did talk about his mother and brother in kinder tones, although he had lost touch with them. His brother was a beta, and last he had heard, Sam had finished a law degree at Stanford. That had been several years ago, and Dean hadn't made effort to stay in touch.

Castiel rummaged through Dean's work desk but found nothing interesting. There was an extra “junk” room as Dean called it, although it was also well organized. A few pieces of furniture that were no longer used in the other parts of the penthouse were placed here; a sofa with a bright abstract print, a glass coffee table which encased a sculpted scene with orange koi and pebbles, a chair that looked more like an giant egg than functional seating. There was also a glass fronted cabinet that was full of souvenirs that Dean had picked up on his travels. There were shelves with books which Castiel looked over, reading the titles to himself. Most of them were classics that were bound in leather, and Castiel suspected they were more for show than actual reading. Castiel ran his fingers along the smooth spines. His hand reached a gap between the books, and when he looked closer, Castiel found a thinner, smaller book wedged between the leather tomes. He carefully worked it out, noting that it was a small photo album. He sat down on the couch to examine it.

Flipping through the pages, Castiel smiled to see Dean as a baby and a small child. There were pictures of him as a kid with a baby, and Castiel assumed that was Sam. Their mother appeared in a couple of pictures; a beautiful woman posing with her children, with sad eyes and a forced looking smile on her face. Castiel wondered what Dean’s father had looked like, but he couldn’t find any pictures of the man as he went through the book, seeing the progression of Dean’s childhood on the pages. There was a gap though; the pictures with his brother and mother stopped when Dean was around fifteen. There were a couple of blank pages in between and then, on the last page, there was a picture of Dean in his graduation cap. The man posed beside him could only be his father _. John Winchester._

Castiel dropped the book in shock. A wave of nausea passed over him as he recalled the alpha’s face, his words, his touch, even his smell. He had to get out of here. He couldn’t stay with Dean. Dean was the son of John. John who had ruined him, who had shared him, and left him for dead. Castiel jumped off the couch, running for the bathroom, barely reaching it before he heaved the contents of his stomach into the toilet. He wiped his mouth with a towel, and gargled with water. He ran to the bedroom he shared with Dean and started throwing clothes into the bag. He pulled the new iPhone that Dean had bought for him and dialed Gabriel’s number. His brother picked up after a couple of rings.

“Cas!” Gabriel said pleasantly. “How are you?”

“Gabriel, I need to stay with you.” Castiel said urgently, the taste of the bile still clinging to his mouth.

“Everything ok?” Gabriel asked, his voice serious. “Are you hurt?”

“I’m ok. I’ll tell you everything when you get me. Please. Hurry.” Castiel said anxiously. He gave his brother the address of a coffee shop around the corner.

“I’ll be there as soon as I can.” Gabriel said firmly and hung up.

Castiel braced himself against the dresser. He wouldn’t cry. The tears would come later, when he was safe with Gabriel.

…

Dean whistled as he entered the penthouse. The place seemed unusually quiet. Usually Castiel had music playing or the TV on. Dean put the bag of take out from La Storia on the counter in the kitchen.

“Cas?” Dean called, wondering where the omega might be. He looked in the living room, and their bedroom. The spare bedroom where Dean had kept Castiel the first time he was here was empty too. The “junk” room was also empty, but Dean noticed a book lying face down on the rug. He picked it up, and saw that it was his family photo album. He hadn’t looked at it in years. He wondered what Castiel had been doing with it.

“Cas?” Dean called again. He checked the bathrooms, which were also empty. “Cas?” He was starting to panic slightly. Dean went back into the bedroom. He noticed that the dresser drawers were open. When he looked inside, they were half empty. Castiel’s clothes were gone. Dean’s heart raced. Where had Castiel gone, and why? Dean thought the omega had been happy. He recalled the conversations they had about suppression but they had agreed that Castiel wouldn’t go back on the meds. Had Dean not noticed that Castiel was unhappy? He looked around the room wildly, hoping for a note or some other explanation. Castiel had not left him any messages on his phone. Dean texted Castiel and then tried calling, but the phone went directly to voicemail. Dean glanced at the bed while he left a voicemail on Castiel’s phone, asking him to call back. He noticed a white slip of paper on his pillow.

 

_Dean –_

_I can’t stay._

_We never talked much about our families, and now I understand why. You always said your father was an asshole, but I never thought much of it, being estranged from my own parents._

_John Winchester was the alpha that almost destroyed me._

_I hope you can understand why I had to leave. I’m safe with my brother Gabriel. I’ll call you when I’m ready to talk. Please don’t try to contact me._

_Love,_

_Cas_

 

Dean reread the words, feeling shocked and angry. It couldn’t be true- could it? Wouldn’t he have known? He tried to convince himself that Castiel must be mistaken, but Dean remembered that Castiel’s alpha had been named John also. And there was this one time his father came home with two of his alpha friends, all of them laughing and bragging about this omega they had shared. Dean had been disgusted by their graphic description of the gang bang and excused himself. Even in his room, he could still hear their laughter and put his headphones on, turning the music up so he didn’t have to hear anymore. _What if…the timing is about right…_ Dean felt increasingly ill. He had never found out the alpha’s full name or the names of his accomplices responsible for hurting Castiel because his mate had asked him not to go after them. And Dean had never told Castiel his father’s name. But in his heart, Dean knew; John was the alpha that had destroyed Castiel. _I’m so sorry Castiel…_

Despite Castiel’s note, Dean’s first instinct was to go over to Gabriel’s place and demand to see Castiel. He wanted to hold his mate tight and assure him that everyone was ok, and Dean would always protect him and love him. Logically, he knew that Castiel probably didn’t want his comfort right now and even worse, he might be disgusted by the sight of Dean. For his part, Dean wasn’t sure he could face Castiel right now, knowing his father was the one who had hurt him so badly. Irrationally, Dean wondered if there was anything he could have done to stop John. He felt guilt and responsibility that wasn’t his to feel. But he could at least call Gabriel and make sure he was ok. Dean found Gabriel’s number easily enough, Castiel had given it to him reluctantly as an emergency contact.

“Hi.” Gabriel said, his voice wary. “Who is this?”

“Dean.” Dean answered. “Dean Winchester.”

“Oh.” Gabriel said flatly.

“Is Cas there? Is he ok?” Dean said, trying to keep his voice steady. Dean could hear Gabriel murmur quietly to someone in the background, who must be Castiel.

“Yes. He’s fine.” Gabriel answered shortly.  

“I just wanted to know that he was ok.” Dean said. “Tell him, I love him. And I’m sorry.”

“Sure.” Gabriel said, sounding surprised that Dean had not demanded to speak to Castiel. “I’ll let him know.”

“Thank you, Gabriel.” Dean said gratefully. He forced himself to hang up the phone.

Dean sat down on the bed heavily.

…

Dean sat in the living room, flipping through the pages of the old photo album. A half empty bottle of scotch sat on the table in front of him. He felt sadness as he looked through the pictures of himself and Sam as kids. The last picture with his mom and brother were when he was fifteen, a week before Mary had finally left John, taking Sam with her. Dean skipped the blank pages. The last picture made him frown. The picture of his father standing awkwardly beside Dean. It was the only picture Dean had kept of the two of them, and mostly only because it was his only picture from graduation. He could have cut his dad out of the photo but he found it served as a reminder of who Dean never wanted to become. He had worked hard to do things differently from his father. But here it was, his father still hurting him and the ones he loved from beyond the grave.

“You were a fucking asshole, Dad.” Dean said out loud. He grabbed the scotch bottle and made a mock toast to his father, taking a generous swig of the liquor.

Dean tossed the book to the side, slumping in the armchair. He was full of guilt and self-loathing, but mostly hatred for his dead father. The penthouse he had lived in by himself for so long now seemed too large without Castiel. He picked up the album again, staring at the picture of himself and his father. Dean had left his father a month after graduation when he had turned 18, relieved to finally be on his own and away from the alcoholic alpha. Dean remembered when his father challenged him to fight him, saying it was for his own good, that he’d be challenged by other alphas when he was an adult. It seemed like it was an excuse for the older alpha to beat him up. John would laugh and call Dean an omega when he knocked him down over and over again. Dean also remembered how John had bragged about all the omegas he had knotted, especially after his mother and brother were no longer living with them. Maybe it was a good thing that John had passed away. Dean would kill him with his bare hands if he was still alive today. He wondered if his father’s friends were still alive and kicking, but pushed aside the thought. It was his father who had hurt Castiel the most, and his father who had been the ring leader. Dean would find no satisfaction hunting down the other two.

“Fuck you, Dad.” Dean raised the bottle and slugged down the remainder of the scotch. “I hope you’re burning in hell.”

Dean felt the alcohol sloshing around his stomach. He hadn’t eaten anything since coming home. He hadn’t been this drunk in a long time. He tried to get up to put himself to bed, but just fell off the couch instead. He lay there, staring at the spinning ceiling. His anger was dissipating, being quickly replaced by sorrow and loss. Castiel might never come back, and Dean wouldn’t blame him. He finally let the tears come.

_I’m so, so sorry Castiel…_


	7. Epilogue

Dean was sitting at the table in the corner of the restaurant. It was mid-afternoon on a summer day. The terrace was open and there were a few people having drinks there. Dean was grateful for the powerful air conditioning inside; he was wearing a suit today, showing his face to greet the patrons. He tapped at his laptop, bringing up the numbers for the last month. The business was steady, and their latest rating in Zagats had helped bring in a constant stream of customers. The influx of tourists during the summer months kept them busy as well. Dean toyed with the idea of being open seven days a week, but the restaurant didn’t need the extra day of business. Dean clicked on the spreadsheet, scanning the expense list.

“Dean.” A familiar voice said softly.

Dean looked up, startled. It was Castiel. He wore a short sleeve button down, and a pair of jeans. He wore glasses and had a bag slung over one shoulder. He was tanned and healthy looking. The mark on his neck was expertly camouflaged; only someone who was looking would notice the patch of skin covered with makeup. He was smiling at Dean.

“Cas…” Dean breathed, wondering if he was dreaming.

He hadn’t seen Castiel for three months now. During the first few weeks after Castiel left, Dean had called Gabriel daily to check on his mate, but Castiel never came to the phone.  When Dean begged, Gabriel only told him that Castiel would contact him when he was ready. Dean started drinking more and eating less, staying in bed most of the time, delegating his restaurant responsibilities. Despite all the time he spent lying down, Dean didn’t sleep well without Castiel; he was constantly plagued by nightmares and insomnia. And still, he heard nothing from Castiel- until one day when a letter arrived in the mail. It had no return address, but Dean recognized the handwriting on the outside of the envelope.

 

_Dear Dean,_

_Thank you for respecting my wishes. It has been painful these few weeks without you, but I hope you understand why I left. Despite what you might think, it wasn’t just because of your father and what he did to me. Yes, finding out that you were John’s son was a shock, and perhaps I should have stayed so we could have confronted the terrible truth together. But my instinct was to flee. I think that you knew that I had been unhappy, despite my best efforts to appear otherwise. I know you tried hard to please me, and I will always be grateful for your kindness and generosity. But I have realized I cannot be your mate, not as an omega. I need the freedom my beta status affords me. I want you to know I have decided to go back to suppression, and also return to work._

_I hope that you can respect my needs and why I can’t be with you now. I will always love you. Perhaps someday, when I am ready, we can start over._

_Always,_

_Cas_

 

Dean could only stare as Castiel sat down across from him. This was the same booth that Dean and Castiel had sat at on their first date. Dean still didn’t quite believe that Castiel was here. Castiel reached a hand across the table to grab Dean’s hand.

“How are you?” Castiel said softly. He noted that Dean was thinner, and that he had dark shadows under his eyes. His hair was longer than he had kept it in the past. Dean just kept staring at Castiel. “I’ve missed you.” Castiel added.

“I’m…” Dean began. “I can’t believe it’s you.” He squeezed Castiel’s hand to reassure himself that Castiel was indeed there.

“It’s me.” Castiel said, smiling gently. “I wanted to ask you something.”

“Anything, Cas.” Dean said, not trusting himself to say more. Castiel was really here. Here to see him.

“Would you like to go for a cup of coffee?” Castiel asked, his tone serious, although his eyes twinkled with amusement.

“Yes.” Dean answered in a rush. Then he realized what Castiel had asked him. “Wait, what?”

Castiel still held Dean’s hand. “Remember? We _didn’t_ have coffee?”

“I remember.” Dean said dazedly. He looked at Castiel, still in disbelief. “Really?”

“Yes.” Castiel replied, running his thumb over Dean’s knuckles.

Dean felt his eyes pool with tears, and he swiped them with his free hand. “I’m so, so sorry, Cas. I didn’t-“

“Shhh.” Castiel cut him off. “Let’s just get a cup of coffee.”

They walked out into the steaming hot day, the sun blindingly bright after the dark of the restaurant. They strolled to the coffee shop on the corner, Castiel still holding Dean’s hand. Dean felt his palm sweating in Castiel’s grip, but somehow the other man’s hand remained cool. He only let go when they found a table. He told Dean to sit while he got them the coffee. Dean sat and watched Castiel as he ordered the drinks. Castiel turned around and smiled at Dean, waving from across the shop. A few minutes later, Castiel came back with two cups of iced coffee and a couple of croissants. He placed Dean’s coffee and pastry in front of him.

Dean watched as Castiel nibble his pastry, but Dean didn’t touch his own. He couldn’t stop looking at his mate. Castiel looked at Dean with tender concern.

“Dean, I’m not going anywhere.” Castiel said gently. “I needed time…but I’m here now.” He reached out for Dean’s hand again.

“I didn’t think you would ever want to come back…” Dean whispered. He squeezed Castiel’s hand to reassure himself that he was still there. He felt dangerously close to crying again. “I’m so sorry…”

“Stop apologizing..it wasn’t your fault. It never was. We can’t choose our parents.” Castiel murmured. He moved closer to Dean.

“I can’t help it..he hurt you so badly. I-“ Dean swiped the back of his free hand across his eyes. He looked down into his lap. “I wish…”

“Shhh.” Castiel soothed. “We don’t need to talk about it now. I just wanted to see you.”

Castiel placed a finger under Dean’s chin, raising it so Dean looked back up at him. Blue eyes tangled with green eyes for a moment, neither of them saying anything. Dean had to look away first. He was still shocked that Castiel was here, sitting next to him, in a coffee shop. He was grateful, but also he was noticing that Castiel was a lot different. He was more confident, and more assertive. He was clearly fully suppressed and living as a beta. Dean hadn’t really known this version of Castiel. He worried that Castiel wouldn’t want or need him now. _But he came to see you. He wanted to see you._

Castiel lifted Dean’s hand to his lips and kissed it. He let go and picked up his coffee, taking a thoughtful sip. “And I wanted you to see me. That I’m doing ok, that I’m happy.”

“You look great, Cas.” Dean agreed. He felt a pang at Castiel’s words. His mate was happy without him.

“Thanks.” Castiel smiled. “I also wanted you to know, I’m ready to start over.”

“You..really?” Dean asked, hope surging in his chest. “I...would like that.” He answered carefully.

“I want to go on proper dates with you, no kidnapping or drugging.” Castiel winked as he said it, so Dean would know he was teasing, but Dean still cringed at how he had treated Castiel in the past. “I want you to accept me as a beta.” He added more seriously.

“Anything Cas. Anything.” Dean said humbly. He had been broken without Castiel. He wanted him back in any way Castiel wanted to be with him.

Castiel dipped his head so his forehead touched Dean’s forehead. “Thank you.”

They stayed like that for a minute, Dean closing his eyes. Castiel sat back. He touched the place where Dean had marked him. Dean wished he could see it. He worried that Castiel might have had it removed, but now as he watched, Castiel swiped his fingers back and forth over the makeup, exposing the scar partially.

“I’m still yours.” Castiel murmured.

Dean nodded. “And I am still yours.” He reached for Castiel’s hand and squeezed it. “Always.”

They held hands quietly, looking at each other. Their eyes said the things that they were not ready to say out loud yet. Dean felt hope and gratitude as he gazed at Castiel. Castiel smiled at Dean, touching his face again before picking up his coffee again.

“To new beginnings.” Castiel said, raising his cup. He watched as Dean lifted his own cup, tentatively touching it to Castiel’s cup.

“To new beginnings.” Dean echoed, finally allowing himself to smile. “And second chances.”


End file.
